voiceless

junior stole money from an envelope he received at school for a yearbook re-imbursement. i called rebecca and told her the situation and she agreed that he would not go on the 5th grade field trip. rebecca called me back at night and told me that she has decided "to give him the benefit of the doubt." (the money was hidden in his shoe for crying out loud!)

she then accused me of abusing junior because i took him by the back of the neck into another room. i told her that i would never hurt junior and she had the nerve of telling me that she "does not like my attitude." i believe that i have the right to have an attitude when someone accuses me of harming my step-children. i also told her that she should tell her husband to stop hitting them if she has a problem with me taking junior by the neck. but of course, her response, like always: "the kids are lying" well, hell, i guess i'll just give them the benefit of the doubt!!!!!!!

i have decided that i will discipline junior as little as possible. it is not in my best interests to continue to try to make this boy a man. his parents put me in the middle and it is an impossible, no win situation, for me. either way, i fail, and junior will be fucked up. i have decided to let his birth parents do that all on their own. when he does something now, it will be "wait until father gets home" i will not call rebecca and let her know anything.

i am finished. i will be a glorified babysitter. afterall, thats what being a step parent is. i cannot voice my concerns at the school. i cannot voice my concerns in the courts. i have no real voice when it comes to my children. because they are not my children. reality check i guess. i am a voiceless parent. which doesn't make for one at all, i suppose.