my kitty died today

earlier this morning, around 9am, my daughter didn't want the kitten to get out so she pulled this large piece of wood against the door as she shut it. when i went to open the door, she was crushed by the large piece of wood and died almost instantly. thank goodness emily was in the car waiting for me and didn't see a thing. she looked at me about an hour later and said "its my fault because i put the wood there" ughhhhh!!! it broke my heart so i told her that mommy accidently crushed her with the door. at first i wrapped her in a towel and put her in the garbage while luis had emily where she could not see anything but when my son junior came home from school and we had to tell him, emily asked if we could bury her.so, we just buried her. junior didn't want to at first but then he came out and joined us. i opened the blanket and they touched her and kissed her goodbye (blood was only on one side so i was able to show her to them). i was very nervous about showing her to them but them it was good because the picture in emily's head was so much worse- she thought her brain was out- it was good for her to see that she still looked the same. just sleeping. that is when we all just started crying pretty hard. emily picked flowers and made a cross out of popsicle sticks and junior wrote a private message in the dirt. my husband and i agree---no more pets. its just too hard to lose them......trying to stay busy and not cry the day away- failing miserably thus far......thanks for listening.